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Rachael1 says:
23 Jan 2011 | 01:58:45
People often say I have OCD, but I tend to ignore them as I am rather eccentric in some ways, my friends reach for the most dramatic explanation. However, I can't help feeling that there is some truth in what they say. I wash my hands several times a day, and won't touch anything dirty or something I could pick up germs from, such as meat. I don't think I will ever touch raw meat by choice, and I have recently been forced to become a vegetarian because suddenly whenever I ate meat I couldn't get the image of raw human flesh all cut up and dripping out of my mind, and it really freaks me out and won't go away. I will not touch dirty water, dish water for example without gloves because just imagining all the germs is like a horror film. I avoid as much as possible contact with dirt, like dust, but when I have to be near it I tend to stop breathing for as long as possible, or break very shallowly so I don't breath it in with all the disgusting stuff that's in dust - dead skin and what not. I am also weary of physical intimacy, I am 16 and have never kissed anyone, or had sex (although to be honest, I'm not in any rush). Just imagining sharing saliva with someone, that messy exchange of fluids, sweat and physical contact. I suppose that could come down to some kind of intimacy issue. Although it doesn't bother me much at the moment, I'm not in any hurry for a relationship, or intimacy, I wonder, will I ever be ready? Although I have all these 'obsessions' I suppose, I don't really have that many 'compulsions', except for avoiding meat and germs, and washing me hands repeatedly and thoroughly. I'm not crazy about keeping everything in order, in fact I'm quite the opposite, I am extremely unorganized. In some ways I am the typical teenager, my room is a mess, I'm often behind on my school work. Blah blah blah. There is just this fear in the back of mind of germs and mess that will make me ill, it makes me want to stop breathing forever so air born germs and diseases can't get me. Although, it's not continual, I had a phase like this a year or so ago, where it suddenly became really strong, but then it faded mostly, and I pretty much forgot about it, and just accepted it as part of my life. But now it's back and it's even worse than the first time. So I'm really not sure what is going on. Do you think I have OCD, because I don't worry that, and this is a very stereotypical example of OCD so I apologize, I don't worry that if I don't do something then I will harm someone I love. It's not that bad. It's mostly fear of illness and germs and being dirty. But I hate the doctor and hospitals and such, it's just a breading ground for germs, and it seems...too sterilized if that makes sense. If something is too clean, it seems dirty in itself...it's hard to explain. So, what do you think? Thank you for listening to me complain, I am just worried and would like a second opinion.
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Hayley Daniels-Lake says:
23 Jan 2011 | 11:11:24
I'm not a doctor and so can't officially diagnose you but that does sound like OCD. Worrying that something bad will come to someone you love is not a necessary requirement to be diagnosed with OCD. Either way, whether or not it is that it is interferring with your life and that in itself is enough to get help. Was there anything that started this off for you or is it something that's always been there to some degree? I'm happy to talk with you more about it if this is what you wanted or I would suggest seeing your doctor and getting some help that way.
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Rachael1 says:
23 Jan 2011 | 14:43:39
As long as I can remember I've always been a quite a germaphobe. I used to suck my thumb as kid and my parents would warn me of all the germs I was putting in my mouth, so I started washing my hands like crazy. And it's just never stopped. I have always been scared of touching meat, again germs, the last time I touched raw meat I cried and washed my hands for 10 minutes. That was about 2 years ago. It's only been recently I haven't been able to eat meat without the horrible images, since early December really. Thanks for you help. It's never really bothered me too much until recently where everywhere I look I can't get the fear of germs out my mind. It's making it difficult to concentrate at school. And part of what is worrying me is the question whether or not I do have OCD, or am I just...fussy or something. 
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Hayley Daniels-Lake says:
23 Jan 2011 | 16:14:48
As I said in my last message although I cannot diagnose you it does sound a lot like OCD. However, I would be wary of putting too much emphasis on the diagnoses. A diagnosis is just a label and whilst that does help with knowing what's wrong and how to go about treating it different diagnoses affect people differently and so more important then the diagnosis itself is how it's affecting you and how its interfering with your life. Whether or not what you're experiencing is OCD it is causing a problem for you and interfering with your life and therefore I would advise getting help anyway. Hayley
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Michelle Dodgson says:
23 Feb 2011 | 17:56:20
Rachael1 wrote: People often say I have OCD, but I tend to ignore them as I am rather eccentric in some ways, my friends reach for the most dramatic explanation. However, I can't help feeling that there is some truth in what they say. I wash my hands several times a day, and won't touch anything dirty or something I could pick up germs from, such as meat. I don't think I will ever touch raw meat by choice, and I have recently been forced to become a vegetarian because suddenly whenever I ate meat I couldn't get the image of raw human flesh all cut up and dripping out of my mind, and it really freaks me out and won't go away. I will not touch dirty water, dish water for example without gloves because just imagining all the germs is like a horror film. I avoid as much as possible contact with dirt, like dust, but when I have to be near it I tend to stop breathing for as long as possible, or break very shallowly so I don't breath it in with all the disgusting stuff that's in dust - dead skin and what not. I am also weary of physical intimacy, I am 16 and have never kissed anyone, or had sex (although to be honest, I'm not in any rush). Just imagining sharing saliva with someone, that messy exchange of fluids, sweat and physical contact. I suppose that could come down to some kind of intimacy issue. Although it doesn't bother me much at the moment, I'm not in any hurry for a relationship, or intimacy, I wonder, will I ever be ready?
Although I have all these 'obsessions' I suppose, I don't really have that many 'compulsions', except for avoiding meat and germs, and washing me hands repeatedly and thoroughly. I'm not crazy about keeping everything in order, in fact I'm quite the opposite, I am extremely unorganized. In some ways I am the typical teenager, my room is a mess, I'm often behind on my school work. Blah blah blah. There is just this fear in the back of mind of germs and mess that will make me ill, it makes me want to stop breathing forever so air born germs and diseases can't get me.
Although, it's not continual, I had a phase like this a year or so ago, where it suddenly became really strong, but then it faded mostly, and I pretty much forgot about it, and just accepted it as part of my life. But now it's back and it's even worse than the first time. So I'm really not sure what is going on.
Do you think I have OCD, because I don't worry that, and this is a very stereotypical example of OCD so I apologize, I don't worry that if I don't do something then I will harm someone I love. It's not that bad. It's mostly fear of illness and germs and being dirty. But I hate the doctor and hospitals and such, it's just a breading ground for germs, and it seems...too sterilized if that makes sense. If something is too clean, it seems dirty in itself...it's hard to explain.
So, what do you think? Thank you for listening to me complain, I am just worried and would like a second opinion.
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Stephen Manning says:
23 Feb 2011 | 19:16:09
Hi. I agree with Hayley that diagnoses and labels can be somewhat reductive. It is easy to lose sight of your own, very personal, experiences. You are you; you are not an entry in a medical dictionary. If you can find a therapist with whom you feel comfortable, you might be able to enter into a supportive relationship. This can help. I have used EFT when working with people who have phobias and this has sometimes alleviated the problem. This is one technique you might like to consider.
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Yvonne Hinckesman says:
25 Feb 2011 | 00:45:36
Hello Rachel, you are not complaining. This is your life that is being affected. I too agree with Hayley and Stephen. I would like to say that your repulsion could be due to a much deeper personal issue of which you are not aware of. I will be happy to explore this area with you. There are many coping techniques which you can try. I will be happy to assist you if you feel that I can be of a benefit to you. Yvonne Hinckesman.
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Kathy Yvanovich says:
25 Feb 2011 | 11:45:33
Hello Rachel, It's good that you came to this appropriate forum to air your worries and concerns. There are so many people ready and able to help you, I trust you'll find the solutions that are right for you so that your life, relationships and surroundings, become more manageable and comfortable. Wishing you every success. Kathy Yvanovich, The Mind Body and Soul Coach
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Diane Lillis says:
25 Feb 2011 | 15:12:02
Hi Rachel, I would like to encourage you in the fact that you have taken the first step to help yourself, by airing your concerns. It sounds like a night mare for you to manage. I agree with all the above comments made by the experts on this site and would like to add that at some point in your life this repulsion started and by continuing to feed this issue keeps it live. I work with people to help them understand how, when and why this started, how this is fed and support you to make some change's. My motto is:- If you always do what you always do you will always get what you always got Counselling is about change. Changing the way you think or behave. Remember you do not have to act upon your thoughts. If you would like to speak with me to understand more, you can find me on this site. Hope this is some what helpful and you find a way to help yourself. Kindest of Regards Diane One2one Counselling
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